20 things I'm thankful for

I didn't do the 30 days of thanks thing. Obviously. But I think it's important, so here's the start of my list. I'll finish it in a few days, when I don't have to be at work six hours from the time I'm posting.


1. I am thankful for my family. My parents have provided me with this amazing home and my car, and I only have to pay for maintenance and "extras." It is such a huge burden lifted off my shoulders when I have outrageous student loans!

25 things.

I started reading a new blog tonight: Momastery. It's the story of Glennon, a beautiful mom of three, and her daily struggles with sanity. She's pretty entertaining.

Anyway. Her very first blog post was the "25 things" that was floating around facebook in 2009. (Proof that I also succumbed..) I remembered mine and thought it would be fun to do a then and now kind of thing. So here goes.


The old one:

1) I argued with Kyle's mother the other night and found out who truly is the bigger person.

2) I really need to start eating healthier.

3) Even with my eating habits, I've managed to lose over 25 lbs. since I left the sorority house. I'm really proud of myself. I'm smaller now than I was 3 out of 4 years in high school.

4) My electromagnetism class is really stressing me out.

5) I'm in love with Pandora radio.

6) I think the tv show House may have made me want to change my specialty from Oncology to Infectious Disease.

7) I was pooped on at the bus stop on Friday.

8) I should wash the silverware all at once so it's not such a pain, but I don't. I wash one utensil whenever I need it.

9) I'm so excited that I've finally started my Bioengineering stuff. I'm on my way!

10) I'm terrified of the Passion Parties expo I'm doing this weekend. I don't have a banner and I'm worried I'll look like an idiot - so unprofessional.

11) I don't miss high school, but I do miss the quality of the friendships I had. I've had a really hard time making friends here since I don't live on campus, and I'm drifting away from the friends I had.

12) My favorite food changes almost daily. It may be anything from mashed potatoes to cheese, Tequila lime turkey tenderloin to green bean casserole.

13) I'm afraid to open bags of microwave popcorn after the story of that guy who got cancer from the microwaved butter fumes.

14) I can't remember the last time I watched tv before December. My mom and sister watched the news while they were down here visiting. I didn't know we got tv signal in our apartment before that, and we've been living here since August.

15) I'm habitually late to everything, and I feel really terrible about it, but I generally don't make any effort to change.

16) I have two 7:30 AM classes. I'm not at all a morning person.

17) I'm addicted to MSOS.

18) I get a lot of bloody noses.

19) I've changed a lot in the last two years. I'm finally happy who I am as a person.

20) Several friendships and my relationship have suffered because of it.

21) I took a women's history class last semester and have changed a lot of my views on society, men, the civil rights movement... all because of that class.

22) I hate being lied to more than nearly anything in the world.

23) I wish I could make friends easier.

24) For the most part, I couldn't care less about turning 21. I don't drink, and I have no friends to go out with if I did.

25) I set my goals for myself way too high.

And now a new one.

1. After swearing off Kyle for a year and a half, he's back around. And that scares me a little. I'm especially nervous about his brother living there now, since it would be an understatement to say we don't get along. Things have been going better than they have in years, and I have a sinking feeling the other people living there are going to ruin that. 
2. I'm fat. I gained 40+ lbs. in Europe last year and have lost less than 20 of that. Ew. 
3. I dropped out of school. Or am taking at least a semester off, anyway. And my dad doesn't know. It makes me nervous that he might find out and tell me how disappointed he is in me. 
4. I am still late to almost everything. Probably the only reason I haven't been written up for it more often at work is because they can't afford to fire me. 
5. I do my dishes like a real adult now, but my house is still almost always cluttered. It's embarrassing, but when I get my one day off a week, I want to cherish it rather than clean. 
6. I have a compulsive shopping problem, and it doesn't discriminate. Groceries, lingerie, eye makeup, shoes... I over-buy all the time. 
7. I love the people I work with (for the most part), but I intensely dislike my job overall. I have a job interview later today, and I'm sitting down with someone else to go over my availability because they've already offered me work. 
8. The forum I wasted more than two years of my life on, I haven't logged into in months. I don't know that I've been on at all this year. I'm embarrassed that it used to consume so much of my time. 
9. I still hate being lied to more than anything else in the world. 
10. The longer I live in this country, the more I know I don't want to for long. I would love to make my home in Europe - preferably Austria. 
11. That deployment that I was so afraid of? It was probably the strongest part of our relationship. It was the coming home part that I should have been worried about. 
12. My newest life goal is to become a master sommelier (hopefully the youngest female master!) and be an overseas editor for one of the wine magazines. 
13. I am slowly working my way through a list of 101 goals, and though my progress may not be as quick as I'd like, I'm really proud of myself. It's a big undertaking and almost all my goals require a substantial amount of effort or planning. 
14. In less than two months, I've paid more than $3500 toward my student loans. Pretty proud of myself - especially on a retail salary. 
15. I purchased a $1000, unlimited year-membership to my favorite yoga studio back in July. I've gone less than ten times and I'm incredibly disappointed in myself, but I still don't try any harder to make it worth my money. 
16. The whole being 21 isn't a big deal thing? I get free wine from work. It took me five months to finish seven bottles. 
17. I limit my interactions with people who have juvenile or intolerant vocabularies. If you use the words "retarded" or "gay" in normal conversation, we probably aren't friends. 
18. I adore my little bird, but I don't let her out as often as I should because I hate that she shits all over everything. 
19. I am constantly multi-tasking. You'll never find me with less than five to seven tabs open on my computer. 
20. I love to read! I currently have 14 books checked out from the library. 
21. I am really jumpy - especially late at night. Sometimes I hate living alone without a scary weapon by my side. 
22. I would love to have a bed and breakfast some day. I love to cook and desperately want an amazing house! 
23. I have the horrible habit of pinning oodles of recipes onto my Pinterest food boards and never making them. 
24. I really want to chop all my hair off, but I've had long hair nearly my entire life. I'm terrified I will cut it short and then hate it. 
25. I am so glad I am constantly growing as a person. Looking back on my list from three and a half years ago, I am surprised at some answers and embarrassed by others. I hope to be able to look back on this in another three years and wonder at the changes I've made. 

There you have it! xoxo

A freebie! And life as I know it.

Attention caregivers!! Caregiver Village is a new site for caregivers that just recently launched. They are offering a 12-month membership for free to get the word out! By clicking through this link, one dollar will be donated to the amazing non-profit I volunteer for. Caregiver Village is for all caregivers. I know most of my amazing friends and followers that are caregivers are caring for their veteran. But no matter if you are caring for a veteran, a special needs child or loved one, a disabled parent, or if you are a home nurse or professional caregiver - they have resources for everyone. There is a caregiving game section, a journaling section, a book club to talk about articles you've come across that have helped you, and many other resources. I've heard some pretty positive things about it. Check it out! Please pass on the link if you know a caregiver or someone who might be able to benefit from their resources. 

Today was the German Reception on campus. Free German food and sweets (marzipan! yum!), as well as information about study abroad programs and the courses that will be offered next semester. I hadn't actually planned on taking a German class this spring, but they are offering a Holocaust class that I don't know that I can resist. Especially after visiting Auschwitz this summer, I would love a class like that. The Holocaust and Jewish history has always interested me. I read Anne Frank's diary at a very young age. I'm interested in seeing what the class is like. 

Picture 33, from today. My little monster was hanging out on top of the kitchen cabinets. Yes, that is my microwave at the bottom of the photo. Raj was being super adorable today. She hung out on my shoulder for quite a while - something she rarely does. No complaints here! Plus, she didn't poop on me. Always a bonus. 

                                       

I have a raging headache. I think I'm outta here for the night. Ciao! 

Photos 25 - 27

Tuesday's photo (Day 25):
I mentioned I went and bought that 3 gal. water jug thing. Well here it is, being a hog in my fridge.

Yesterday's photo (Day 26):
I love it when Raj runs around on the floor. She is such a ham, and I had to take a picture. Yes, I do need to vacuum my floor. She knows how to make a huge mess.

And today! Day 27. I tried to get a part of the display that wasn't quite so gruesome. Looks like I wasn't quite successful, but hopefully the picture is small enough that it doesn't matter. We had some people from AbortionNO.org (or I'm assuming, since that's the web address that was plastered up) on campus today. They had their huge fear-mongering abortion display boards right outside the MU. I really can't stand these campaigns. People are going to have abortions whether or not you try to tell them that it's genocide, or throwing their baby in the trash, or any of the other things the posters said. Ugh.

I took an amazing 2+ hour nap earlier, and now I'm ready to do something productive! I think after I finish my German homework, I'll come back and review an article on PTSD that I read earlier today. Ciao!

Bath time with birdy!

I used to take Raj out every morning and have her in the bathroom with me when I'd take a shower. That was her usual social time. Then, I went on vacation and after I came back, she would scream and yell and hoot and holler every morning and I didn't feel like spending time with her. I usually felt a little bit like wringing her neck when she started screeching at 7AM.

She has since re-learned how to behave, and I got up early this morning, so I brought her into the bathroom with me again. She usually hangs out either on the shower rod or on my head. The latter is not so conducive to showering, so usually I'll go about my business as usual, and she'll fly off somewhere when I dunk my head back under the water. Today, it was to the top of my little storage shelf thing I have in there.

So, without further ado, my adorable birdy!

She was trying to eat the string on my loofah. Goofball.

Mark was leaving as I was heading into work this morning. We chatted a little about my awesome beer chili, and I think I just agreed to bring in Thanksgiving dinner if I work on Thanksgiving.

And to top off my awesome day, I got a 94% on my German oral exam this morning! It would have been even higher if I hadn't fed Jessica all the talking points. I didn't realize that as a tourist, I was supposed to provide half the knowledge. She had only said I had to do half the talking, which I certainly did. Oh well! An A is an A.

I read an article about this amazing woman today. She completed the B of A Chicago Marathon (yes, all 26.2 miles) and gave birth 7 hours later. I want that to be me. I want to be in such amazing shape that I can run a marathon pregnant - hell, even run a marathon at all! And she completed it in something around 6.5 hours.

I found some really fantastic articles today. I have three tabs open with PTSD articles right now that I want to say something about, but I want to give them the time and thought they deserve. With this hellacious math test coming up tomorrow, I definitely don't have the time right now.

So I should probably head off and study! Ciao!

365 questions: 131 - 140

131. How have you changed in the last five years?  Five years? Wow. Five years ago, I was 18. I was just starting school at the University of Idaho. I had just joined a sorority. I was heavier than I am now. I drank like a fish and was absolutely boy crazy. Five years ago, I was still stuck on the stupid ex I followed to school. I lived 8 miles away from my best friend and we had sleepovers in my twin bed. I was surprisingly much more involved in church than I am now. 


What's different now? I moved 2,000 miles away. I'm 2,000 miles from my best friend (though she still is my bff!). I live alone and am MUCH more capable of keeping my space clean. I am "wiser" than I was. I cry much more often. I am much quicker to anger if I don't watch myself. I have a much better relationship with my parents, and a worse one with my sister. I have stopped playing the piano - haven't done so in more than three years. I no longer sing, really, other than along with the radio. I am much more concerned now about success, as opposed to the fun I focused on five years ago. 


But in a lot of ways, I'm still the same person. I am simultaneously surprised by how much I've changed, and how much I am still the same person I was. 

132. What are you sure of in your life?  I am sure that happiness and success are both attainable. I am sure that good friends make the bad days easier and the good days brighter. 


133. When you think of ‘home,’ what, specifically, do you think of?  Normally when I think of home, I think of the house I live in and the memories I've created here. My wonderful little birdy that sits in the living room. If I'm referring to Alaska when I say 'home,' I usually mean the house my parents live in currently. The room I spent my high school years in. My hometown, where I have 21 years of memories. 

134. What’s the difference between settling for things and accepting the way things are?  To me, settling implies that you think you deserve better. It has a negative connotation. Accepting things the way they are has a positive spin to it - accepting that you can't change things that you have no control over and being okay with that. 


135. How many of your friends would you trust with your life?  A small handful. Erika. Ryan. Jacey and Mike. Kris and Dave. Probably a few others. 

136. What’s your definition of heaven?  Hmmm. Good question! I believe heaven is a place free from pain and suffering. A place of eternal happiness. I also believe that there aren't relationships in heaven as there are on earth. I'm not really sure how to put all my beliefs into words, to be honest. I haven't thought much about it. 


137. What is your most prized possession?  I wouldn't say my awesome birdy counts as a "possession," so I suppose I would have to say my phone or my computer. Those are the things I would rush to save in a fire, anyway. Phone, computer, purse/wallet. Everything else, I can live without. 

138. How would you describe yourself in one sentence?  I am a life-long learner. I think that sentence best describes me. I love doing new things, learning new things, trying new activities, eating new foods, traveling to new places. There is something to learn from every experience, and I want to experience it all!


139. What stands between you and happiness? Only myself. I am the master of my own happiness. If I am not happy, it is because I have not chosen to be happy. 

140. What makes a person beautiful?  I think surface/outward beauty plays a very small part in overall beauty. Beauty is a reflection of your inner self. Kindness, generosity, loyalty, service, sacrifice, dedication, honesty - your character is what makes you beautiful. I am a firm believer that you can be the most attractive person around, but if you are nasty and hateful, you are not beautiful. 

It's finally fall!!

75 degrees outside right now, at noon. We had an awesome monsoon last night with the best thunder I've heard in a long while. I love fall in Arizona! We might not have changing leaves, but we have monsoons which are so amazing.

Had my German test earlier. Blech. I didn't study nearly as much as I should have. I tried studying last night but wasn't feeling well, so I went to bed early. I set my alarm to get up half an hour early this morning to study, but didn't do that either. So there was very little studying done for this test. Thankfully we had a few extra credit questions. Hopefully those will give me a little boost.

Tonight is my last "free" night this week. I'm had planned on going to the Chris Young concert with Lori, but she wasn't able to switch her work schedule, so she isn't able to go. I suppose I'll suck it up and not go, then, since I don't want to find someone else to go with me at such late notice. (Plus, I have an O-Chem test on Friday and my time could be better spent studying.) A little bummed, but oh well. It's the better decision for sure. I think I'm going to go to the Trace Adkins concert with her husband next week, and the three of us are probably going to see Darius Rucker later this month.

I paid off another chunk of tuition today. I only have $3500 left! I definitely had not planned on taking this long to pay everything off, so I'm a little irritated - mostly about the ticket insurance situation, since that's an extra $1600 that could be in my pocket right now, but I'll make it happen.

My tire pressure is low again. It always happens in the fall, with the change in weather. That's one of the downsides of being single, and of no longer living/working at Wilshire. I don't have a man to air up my tires anymore, and I hate having to pay for air at the gas station. I'm thinking about stopping by Wilshire tomorrow anyway and seeing if Mohammed has a minute to fill 'em up.

Yesterday's photo! (Day 18):
My adorable little birdy likes to hang out and take a bath in her water dish. She also has a toy, made from a wooden cooking spoon, that hangs right above said dish. I've noticed lately that she likes to scratch her head on it when she's bathing, and was finally able to snap a photo yesterday.

Today! (Day 19):
My favorite place to unwind.

In other news, Sarah Palin announced today that she will not be running in this presidential election! Amusingly, the caption of the video at the top of the CNN announcement page, is "Palin 'thankful' not to be running." Don't worry, Palin! You're not the only one!

I have some studying to do for Friday's O-Chem test since I won't be around much tomorrow evening. I should probably get on that. Ciao!

A new book, and some birdy news!

Lindsey recommended a week or so ago that I read Why Mars and Venus Collide, by Dr. John Gray. And so I am! I put in a hold at the library and I got it yesterday. I'm going to do the same note-taking thing here that I've done in the past.

• Life is not about having everything our own way whenever we want it. 
• No one is ever perfect, but your partner can be the perfect person for you. 
• If we continue to correct and adjust ourselves, we can create a lifetime of love. When we can own our mistakes and adjust our actions, we can reduce the tension in our relationships. 
• By examining how we behave differently in stressful situations, a woman's never-ending to-do list, for example, I hope to give you new insights into how our diverse responses to stress cause us to clash. [This one made me laugh, because just last night, I was transferring over the huge to-do list I wrote for myself at work this weekend into my planner.]
• Respect is honoring who a person is and being open to appreciate everything he or she has to offer. [I'm not sure I totally agree with this definition, but I do like the first part. Honoring.]
• Women today are so tired and stressed, they too want a happy wife to greet them at home. [Interesting! And I sort-of agree. I know I definitely appreciated it when Kyle picked me up from work and/or had made lunch/dinner, etc. and was both that smiling face and had helped out around the house.]
• Returning home after work causes most women's stress levels to increase. 

And I think I'm done reading for the day now. At least that. I'm going to watch a bit of the Casey Anthony trial online, and try to get my birdy to snuggle with me. I discovered today after walking into the bedroom to find an egg at the bottom of the cage, that my Raj is not a boy bird! 

Hello, little egg. 

It was cracked from dropping. :(

My birdy is a big girl now! It's so weird to say that. Someone suggested I change her name to Jasmine, to stay in the same vein. I'm not sure I'm a huge fan of that, but I might call her Jazz. I'm so overwhelmed! My bird has a sex change just a few hours ago! I'm still not sure how to process all of this. 

I finished up my evening watching some amazing ACN training. This month's video was so inspirational! I am looking forward to making ACN work for me. I haven't tried hard enough to get this off the ground - especially since I've been dealing with everything surrounding the house, and breakup drama, etc. - and I am the reason I have not done well. I am taking responsibility for my business right now. I am dedicated to making this work for me, and I know it can happen. Starting now, I will not make any more excuses. ACN is my vehicle to my savings goal. $15K, here I come! 

With that, I'm getting pretty sleepy and I have a dance lesson with Tony tomorrow. I need to get my beauty sleep relatively soon! Goodnight, world. <3

Yeah, about that list...

I don't think I got a single thing on there accomplished, except the dishes and laundry. I had Raj out of his house, hanging out with me all day, and wasn't paying as close attention as I probably should have. Right around 2, I noticed he was hanging out on the coffee table and hadn't moved in a while. At first I thought he was sleeping, but his head was in a weird position - one he never sleeps in. I took a closer look, and he had been munching on my O-Chem syllabus and gotten the staple stuck in his tongue/beak. The poor guy had dripped a decent amount of blood (or what I thought was blood) all down the page. I got the staple out and called the exotic animal vet in Mesa, and they suggested he come in. 

So we went in, they weighed him (90 grams), clipped his nails, and it turned out that he had a puncture wound and a laceration on his tongue. The vet and vet tech spooked him when they walked into the room, though, and he ended up flying straight into the window seven times. I started tearing up in the office. My poor baby! 

I walked out with a poor, stunned bird and a $140+ vet bill. That little turd had better know that I love him! That's more than I paid for him + his cage. 

It is the coldest day I have ever experienced in Arizona today. 28 at about 8:30, 35 at about 10, and 38 at 12:15ish. Coming to class this evening, I wore a knee-length pea coat, a scarf, and North Face gloves. All were different colors, so I probably looked really silly. Oh well! I was nice and warm. 

And the worst class of my week is starting. Gotta go!

Zumba!

I went to my very first Zumba class yesterday!!!! I had such a blast. I bought a Groupon back in August (two, actually) for four dance fitness classes at Express Mie, a female dance fitness studio that's right down the street. I finally activated them on Monday and went to my first class yesterday. It was taught by Serina, who apparently is taking a break after this week, which I'm a little bummed about. I don't think I have ever produced as much sweat in one workout as I did in that 45-minute class.

Today, I took a bath with my favorite birdy. He kept flying on my head when I was in the shower, so I put him down on the tub ledge. He went to town. I tried to get a video, but he stopped as soon as I turned the water off. I did get a few of him preening afterward, with his wet feathers, though. As soon as I can get my phone to recognize my computer again, I'll upload and link them. He's been absolutely adorable today! He fell asleep on one of my slippers earlier, just hanging out on the floor.

Nothing else terribly exciting happened today. Tomorrow and Friday, I'm modeling for a sculpture class, so I need to make some lunch stuff here in a little bit, and I'll probably head to bed early. I also got less than 6 hours of sleep last night, so that would probably be a good idea anyway.