365 questions: 326 - 332

326. What questions do you often ask yourself?

I constantly am asking where I'm going in life. I set goals for myself and check in on a regular basis, because I know I won't make progress if I don't hold myself accountable. 


327. What are you an expert at?

Algebra. Drinking wine pretentiously.



328. How would an extra $1000 a month change your life?

I could put an extra $800+ toward my student loans, and have a little extra to spend on myself every month. I deserve a massage every once in a while, but I never treat myself to one. It would be pretty stellar! I could also cut down my hours at work drastically, and afford to take a day off on occasion rather than once every 2+ months. 


329. What things in life should always be free?

Love. Healthcare (or at the very least, affordable).


330. What is your favorite time of the year?

Autumn. I absolutely love the changing leaves. The colors, the weather - I adore the fall!


331. What is something you have always wanted since you were a kid?

Success. From a very young age, my parents instilled a huge drive in me for success. Much more than material things, that is what I've wanted for years.


332. What is the most recent dream you remember having while sleeping?

Haha! I was just retelling it. Kyle was going to school, and we were discussing his sleeping arrangements - something like a cross between a dorm and a co-ed sleeping porch. And I was mad. 

I'm excited to be an adult!

I couldn't sleep last night because I was lying in bed thinking about some of the changes I'm so excited to make in the upcoming months. What to do about my current job. How my new business cards should look. Where to network to find customers. Whether it's important to have a website. How marketable I will be without my sommelier certifications. How exciting it will be to put out a blanket and sleep on my own land the night I sign the paperwork. Where I should put the enormous Costco wine fridge when I finally purchase it.

Decisions, decisions!

It also occurred to me today that, when the B&B is open, I should have monthly themed wine dinners. The wine team dinners don't have to stop when I'm no longer a part of the wine team! They can be my practice for the future - a cross between the classes I teach now and the wine dinners I love.

And then the more immediate future - I accepted a new tutoring client today. I'll be working with a third-grade boy to improve his understanding of math. The young girl I'm currently working with completed her final on Friday, and got an 81%! I am so excited for her - especially considering she failed a number of her earlier tests this past semester. Her parents just said they want to expand our tutoring sessions to encompass science and English as well, so our twice-weekly sessions will probably double, at a minimum. I had four sessions scheduled last week with the single mom I'm tutoring, and she said she will want to continue to meet 2 - 3 times per week during the semester. Plus, I still have the two math students sticking with me from last semester!

I'm super excited to take on more clients, because that means I can cut back my hours at work without a painful blow to my bank account. I can do more of something I find gratifying and satisfying and less of something I don't care to do.

This is my I'm an adult outfit. 

And that leaves me more time to be an adult. Like tonight, where I drove to the library in my *cough* "housecoat" and "relaxing pants" because I worked 61 hours just at my unsatisfying job. I came home and just had to get out of my awful work clothes.

Speaking of work clothes - one of the things I am most looking forward to about consulting is that I can wear my real clothes again. I absolutely loathe that every day, I wear the same thing to work. Sure, I might change up the pants, or the tank I wear under my work shirt, but the idea is the same. I can't wear a skirt. Or heels. Or that (hypothetical, of course) fabulous new sweater I bought. I just got a new amazing cashmere scarf in the mail and can't wear it because I work so often I never get the chance to dress up and go out.

I'm looking forward to wearing clothes that I get to choose. I'm looking forward to real sweater weather. I'm looking forward to getting paid to cook for other people. I'm looking forward to owning my own home, with my own land, my own yard, no upstairs neighbors vacuuming at midnight, and no 6am leaf-blowers outside my window. I'm looking forward to decorating each room exactly the way I want to, and having much more time to myself.

I called Mom tonight and was talking about tutoring, and work, and school, and whatnot. She said it sounds like I'm much more excited and motivated about school this time around, so she's excited that I seem to have set my mind on nothing less than success. I'm excited for school because I'm excited to be done. I'm excited that it means I'm taking this next step in life and I'm so ready for that.

xo!

20 things I'm thankful for

I didn't do the 30 days of thanks thing. Obviously. But I think it's important, so here's the start of my list. I'll finish it in a few days, when I don't have to be at work six hours from the time I'm posting.


1. I am thankful for my family. My parents have provided me with this amazing home and my car, and I only have to pay for maintenance and "extras." It is such a huge burden lifted off my shoulders when I have outrageous student loans!

25 things.

I started reading a new blog tonight: Momastery. It's the story of Glennon, a beautiful mom of three, and her daily struggles with sanity. She's pretty entertaining.

Anyway. Her very first blog post was the "25 things" that was floating around facebook in 2009. (Proof that I also succumbed..) I remembered mine and thought it would be fun to do a then and now kind of thing. So here goes.


The old one:

1) I argued with Kyle's mother the other night and found out who truly is the bigger person.

2) I really need to start eating healthier.

3) Even with my eating habits, I've managed to lose over 25 lbs. since I left the sorority house. I'm really proud of myself. I'm smaller now than I was 3 out of 4 years in high school.

4) My electromagnetism class is really stressing me out.

5) I'm in love with Pandora radio.

6) I think the tv show House may have made me want to change my specialty from Oncology to Infectious Disease.

7) I was pooped on at the bus stop on Friday.

8) I should wash the silverware all at once so it's not such a pain, but I don't. I wash one utensil whenever I need it.

9) I'm so excited that I've finally started my Bioengineering stuff. I'm on my way!

10) I'm terrified of the Passion Parties expo I'm doing this weekend. I don't have a banner and I'm worried I'll look like an idiot - so unprofessional.

11) I don't miss high school, but I do miss the quality of the friendships I had. I've had a really hard time making friends here since I don't live on campus, and I'm drifting away from the friends I had.

12) My favorite food changes almost daily. It may be anything from mashed potatoes to cheese, Tequila lime turkey tenderloin to green bean casserole.

13) I'm afraid to open bags of microwave popcorn after the story of that guy who got cancer from the microwaved butter fumes.

14) I can't remember the last time I watched tv before December. My mom and sister watched the news while they were down here visiting. I didn't know we got tv signal in our apartment before that, and we've been living here since August.

15) I'm habitually late to everything, and I feel really terrible about it, but I generally don't make any effort to change.

16) I have two 7:30 AM classes. I'm not at all a morning person.

17) I'm addicted to MSOS.

18) I get a lot of bloody noses.

19) I've changed a lot in the last two years. I'm finally happy who I am as a person.

20) Several friendships and my relationship have suffered because of it.

21) I took a women's history class last semester and have changed a lot of my views on society, men, the civil rights movement... all because of that class.

22) I hate being lied to more than nearly anything in the world.

23) I wish I could make friends easier.

24) For the most part, I couldn't care less about turning 21. I don't drink, and I have no friends to go out with if I did.

25) I set my goals for myself way too high.

And now a new one.

1. After swearing off Kyle for a year and a half, he's back around. And that scares me a little. I'm especially nervous about his brother living there now, since it would be an understatement to say we don't get along. Things have been going better than they have in years, and I have a sinking feeling the other people living there are going to ruin that. 
2. I'm fat. I gained 40+ lbs. in Europe last year and have lost less than 20 of that. Ew. 
3. I dropped out of school. Or am taking at least a semester off, anyway. And my dad doesn't know. It makes me nervous that he might find out and tell me how disappointed he is in me. 
4. I am still late to almost everything. Probably the only reason I haven't been written up for it more often at work is because they can't afford to fire me. 
5. I do my dishes like a real adult now, but my house is still almost always cluttered. It's embarrassing, but when I get my one day off a week, I want to cherish it rather than clean. 
6. I have a compulsive shopping problem, and it doesn't discriminate. Groceries, lingerie, eye makeup, shoes... I over-buy all the time. 
7. I love the people I work with (for the most part), but I intensely dislike my job overall. I have a job interview later today, and I'm sitting down with someone else to go over my availability because they've already offered me work. 
8. The forum I wasted more than two years of my life on, I haven't logged into in months. I don't know that I've been on at all this year. I'm embarrassed that it used to consume so much of my time. 
9. I still hate being lied to more than anything else in the world. 
10. The longer I live in this country, the more I know I don't want to for long. I would love to make my home in Europe - preferably Austria. 
11. That deployment that I was so afraid of? It was probably the strongest part of our relationship. It was the coming home part that I should have been worried about. 
12. My newest life goal is to become a master sommelier (hopefully the youngest female master!) and be an overseas editor for one of the wine magazines. 
13. I am slowly working my way through a list of 101 goals, and though my progress may not be as quick as I'd like, I'm really proud of myself. It's a big undertaking and almost all my goals require a substantial amount of effort or planning. 
14. In less than two months, I've paid more than $3500 toward my student loans. Pretty proud of myself - especially on a retail salary. 
15. I purchased a $1000, unlimited year-membership to my favorite yoga studio back in July. I've gone less than ten times and I'm incredibly disappointed in myself, but I still don't try any harder to make it worth my money. 
16. The whole being 21 isn't a big deal thing? I get free wine from work. It took me five months to finish seven bottles. 
17. I limit my interactions with people who have juvenile or intolerant vocabularies. If you use the words "retarded" or "gay" in normal conversation, we probably aren't friends. 
18. I adore my little bird, but I don't let her out as often as I should because I hate that she shits all over everything. 
19. I am constantly multi-tasking. You'll never find me with less than five to seven tabs open on my computer. 
20. I love to read! I currently have 14 books checked out from the library. 
21. I am really jumpy - especially late at night. Sometimes I hate living alone without a scary weapon by my side. 
22. I would love to have a bed and breakfast some day. I love to cook and desperately want an amazing house! 
23. I have the horrible habit of pinning oodles of recipes onto my Pinterest food boards and never making them. 
24. I really want to chop all my hair off, but I've had long hair nearly my entire life. I'm terrified I will cut it short and then hate it. 
25. I am so glad I am constantly growing as a person. Looking back on my list from three and a half years ago, I am surprised at some answers and embarrassed by others. I hope to be able to look back on this in another three years and wonder at the changes I've made. 

There you have it! xoxo

365 questions: 225 - 235

225. What is your saddest memory?  I tend to block super emotional stuff out. If you want a recent sad memory, though, it would be me at Jerry's funeral, knowing I didn't make it home in time to say goodbye. That breaks my heart. 

226. What would you like to change?  The number on the scale. For something less superficial, the amount of money I owe in student loans. 

227. How many people do you love?  Lots. I can't help but care about people. 

228. What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?  Oh, goodness. The best one I've ever made? I don't know for certain. The decision to learn from my past mistakes rather than regretting anything was probably a wise one, though. 

229. What’s your favorite true story that you enjoy sharing with others?  I love recounting my ridiculous adventures in Italy from last summer - couchsurfing with men who proposed marriage, getting a room with three guys I'd met an hour before, and sharing one bed with two other people who were both feeling a little amorous. 

230. Right now, at this moment, what do you want most?  I want to know what the future holds. I've never been big on surprises. I like to have all my shit in line, and life has sorta thrown me a twist lately. 

231. What are you waiting for?  How are you writing your life’s story?  I'm waiting for love and for success. But I'm writing my story with a little humor. 

232. What makes love last?  Hard work, every day. Love is a decision, not just an emotion. 

233. What good comes from suffering?  Strength and the experience. Every experience is one from which to learn. 

234. What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned in the last year?  Don't take anything for granted. Not love, not people, not money. 

235. Based on you current daily actions and routines, where would you expect to be in five years?  Ideally, I would be writing for a wine magazine or consulting for a snooty restaurant. Happily married to the love of my life. Student loans hopefully paid off. Probably without kids. 

If you're healthy and you know it...

Since I started my little weight-loss challenge with the ladies of MSOS (on March 23rd), I've lost more than five pounds. I haven't really been exercising much more, but I've been downing more than half my weight in ounces of water every day, and changing the way I snack. And it's working!

So Thursday, I rewarded myself with a beautiful loaf of bread from Great Harvest. And for perhaps the first time ever, I was disappointed. Their Maple-Nut Pull-apart was good, but not my favorite from them. So, again for the first time ever, I didn't finish the whole loaf. That probably shouldn't be something I'm super proud of, considering eating an entire loaf of bread by myself is not exactly conducive to weight loss, but oh well. Go me.

I had a super fabulous weekend! Miranda came over after work on Saturday, and we watched Bounty Hunter. It was really cute. Plus Gerard Butler is in it, so neither of us were complaining. I ended up working GI Joe's shift for him on Easter Sunday, so I had to be in at 6AM. I put in 8 hours at time & a half, and unloaded three pallets of freight all by my lonesome. Then G came over for dinner, and grilled me up the best steak I've ever had in my life.

Note to self: Never marry a man who can't grill a steak. That shit's important, yo. (Because God knows I'm super fail at grilling. Somebody's got to do it!)

We went to The Melting Pot last night, and for a variety of reasons, it was absolutely my favorite time there. I love playing dress-up; I went in planning to pay for everything so I didn't have to worry about a fight over money; we had a parade of servers and managers stopping by our table to say hi, check in on us, and invite us to parties (rock on!); G may have stolen a few extra mints from the jar on our way out for me; and he blew my socks off and ended up paying for everything. Seriously, everything. He handed my credit card back to me and said I could pick up the tab at Oregano's after my concert next week. We spent the whole night laughing and having a wonderful time. Plus our server was hilarious and awesome. Huge fan. That's an experience that needs to be repeated.

Speaking of dress-up, I commissioned some hair pieces yesterday, too! My awesome friend Candice is crafty and makes beautiful hair doodads, so I asked her to make a few for me. One of 'em I commissioned with an occasion like last night in mind. Bohemian, something to add a little flair, but elegant and classy. I'm super excited to see what she comes up with!

I went to the Apple store this morning to have them take a look at my phone. I walked out of there without spending a dime, with a phone that works! Amazing. The last 24 hours have been so fantastic I can't even handle it.

Tomorrow I have a dinner date with GI Joe, since he bought me an amazing bottle of (Gaja) wine for taking over his shift. I'm making veal parmesan for the first time ever, so here's to hoping it won't be a disaster. On a related note, I have tons of homework to do, and some more marinara to make, so sayonara! May your day be as wonderful as mine has been, and may all your camels be fertile.

xoxo!

Such crap.

Warning: I'm probably going to do a lot of whining and feeling sorry for myself. So if you don't want to hear it, you might want to make your way to the next post, or click the little red X and go on your merry way. 

I feel like crap. I felt fine when I woke up this morning, and most of the afternoon, but right now I just feel like ass. My tummy hurts. My back hurts. My bra has decided to be an inadequate boulder holder, so I've spent half my day shoving my boobs back down in it. Good times, right?

Then I had an appointment this afternoon. Paid $30 to hear something I had already figured out myself. Tres unhelpful, doc. Thanks. 

I ended up dropping my German comp class this morning, too. This is the prof who has marked me absent when I haven't been, has grading policies that... I disagree with, let's say. She also gave me a B on my first essay but the one I just got back last week? Failed me. Sorry, my writing style hasn't changed that much in the last month. And it certainly hasn't gotten that much worse. Rather than argue about everything, I decided to drop the class and use that time to be more productive in my other classes. I'll just retake it next fall. Pain? Yes. Worth it? Also yes. 

It always astonishes me how much food I can have in this house and still not find anything good to eat. Looks like I will be going to the grocery store later this evening, if I can muster up the energy. 

Lying on the floor, I'm noticing what a crappy job the restoration team did. The paint on the walls is uneven and streaky. There's a dent near the french doors that looks like a bad patch job when they swapped out the bottom two feet of sheetrock. The hall wall outlet is crooked. Spectacular workmanship, Pinnacle Restoration. Thanks a million. I'm still waiting on my old sink back. My favorite part of this whole ordeal was getting a shittier faucet contraption than I had before. This one is reminiscent of the one at my parents' first house in Alaska... built in the '80s. Just what I've always wanted. Two thumbs up, guys. 

I started a new blog today. Yeah, I know. Just what I need - another time waster. I've thought about having a food blog for a while now. I looked up the requirements for the FoodBuzz program (not only do they send you cool stuff to try every once in a while, but you can earn money through their ads - and actually earn money; not just think you can like the Google program), and 9/10 posts have to be food related. This one definitely doesn't qualify. 

So I started a new one! It's going to be food- and wine-centric. I love food, and experimenting in the kitchen, and I love wine, and can get discounts on some awesome bottles. So there we have it! I only have an intro post up right now. I don't think I'm going to transfer any of my food posts from here over, since my photos are all crap. I'll post a link to it when I get things more up-and-running. In the meantime, I'm using Blogger's boring Dynamic Views layout. If anyone comes across a good wine layout, please sent it my way! They're apparently few and far between, and most of them suck. 

I haven't been very productive all day, so I should probably make my way to get some groceries before I hunker down and finish memorizing this ridiculous German script for tomorrow's performance. Ciao! 

Well. 31 day blogging fail.

I had a meeting with Brenda last night at Starbucks, then headed to Los Dos Melinos with Mike and Jace and got ice cream afterward, so blogging didn't happen.

Instead, I've been thinking about things I need to get done while I'm up in AK. What better place for a to-do list than a public spot so people can either hold me accountable or remind me? So here it is!

• Eye doctor appt
• Vag doctor appt (refill rxs)
• Dentist appt
• Dermatologist appt
• Hair appt
• Get more Mary Kay foundation
• Eat at Moose's Tooth!
• Go to REI and look at packs that have detachable day packs.
• Mani/pedi

And I'm sure I will add to that in the few weeks following. 

I went to Total Wine today after work, and John (one of the managers) was up at the front. Their Spain and Portugal class is on the 23rd. I asked him if he would comp it for me as a birthday present. The short version is yes. I'm going as his guest, since employees can bring a guest to classes for free. Yahoo! That's if I don't end up going to San Jose. I have to fit the Alaska trip in some time in the next few weeks (read: before my birthday) so we'll see how dates work out. 

Ryan and I ironed out seat plans today! We're sitting next to each other for the Athens -> Philly leg. Did I mention I'm excited?! 

And to round out the day, I just needed to share that I woke up this morning at 10, and was out the door and at the "gym" in 15 minutes. Motivator. Super skinny, here I come!